Soap Star’s Personal Tragedy Inspires Him to Help Foundation for Mentally Ill
By:  Kelly Rouba

While listening to soap opera star Thom Bierdz recount past events in his life, it would seem as if he might be referring to the role he plays on The Young and the Restless—but he’s not.

Bierdz, who portrays Phillip Chancellor III on the CBS daytime drama, endured the painful loss of his brother Gregg as a result of suicide in 2002 as well as his mother, who died in 1989 after
his other brother Troy beat her with a baseball bat. Troy, who was diagnosed as a paranoid schizophrenic after being convicted of murder, is now serving a life sentence in a Wisconsin prison.

According to Bierdz, Troy began exhibiting symptoms of schizophrenia around the age of 15, which is common. During Troy’s teenage years, “he was really acting out,” Bierdz recalls.
 
Bierdz, who is eight years older than Troy, had already moved away from home before his brother began exhibiting symptoms of mental illness. “He had kept diaries on killing animals and he had written Satanic poems and he had sent me letters on how he was going to kill me,” Bierdz said.

However, Bierdz didn’t take his brother seriously and, other than that, he didn’t have much contact with Troy. “I wasn’t aware of what he was putting my mom through. She didn’t want to worry me that much because I was in Hollywood on The Young and the Restless,” Bierdz said.

But Troy’s behavior did upset their mother. “She was very concerned for him, and she had taken him to many counselors—and really about 40 of them from the time he was 15 to 19 because he would be institutionalized and then he would maybe strike out at a nurse and so they would kick him out of the institution and he would end up in prison and would try to kill himself. So, they would bring him back to the institution and, eventually, they just didn’t have a place for him and they were not going to deal with him anymore.”

Troy ultimately wound up in his mother’s care again. “He did live with me a little while in ‘88, a year before he killed mom. He did come out with me when I was on the soap opera, and I got him a job at CBS for a security position, which he never showed up for. But, my brother, he seemed shy. He was a nice guy to me, for the most part (at that time), but then I don’t know what was going through his mind,” Bierdz said, adding, “He did experiment with drugs. He did have severe anger issues and, you know, he did kill mom.”

After his mother’s death, Bierdz decided to disassociate from Troy. “My family is not a violent family, so the fact that my brother would kill my mother was really, really shocking, and none of us wanted anything to do with him after that. We really had no intention of ever seeing him again; we were so mad at him.”

But, after several years passed by, Bierdz changed his mind and reconnected with Troy. “I realized that my mom would want me to forgive him,” he said, adding that he realized nothing would bring his mother back. “Lecturing (Troy) is not going to do anything (either, so I said) let me be a big brother now and see if we can make the best of his life.”

Bierdz still isn’t certain as to whether Troy had been diagnosed with schizophrenia by the time they reconnected, but he does recall that his brother did not look well. “When I reunited with him, he had been in prison five years in his cell at 23 hours a day, staring at the ceiling with a mind that had killed his mother. So if he wasn’t schizophrenic before he got in, he certainly was schizophrenic five years later when I discovered him and saw how…he just looked crazy.”

“Today, he is diagnosed as schizophrenic—a paranoid schizophrenic—and he talks about it and we kind of discuss it,” Bierdz added. But back then, “I don’t know if (the doctors) made a diagnosis. I don’t know if they felt they needed to. They just realized that he should be in a psychiatric unit, which he’s been in for 20 years. (It) is the best place for him because they do medicate him.”

These days, “he’s getting great medication, but he was also treated when he wasn’t in prison, before he killed mom and, obviously, it didn’t work.”

However, not having a proper diagnosis didn’t help matters either. For years, “we didn’t know if he was schizophrenic or not because my mother did take him to many, many doctors and most of them said, ‘No, he’s not. He’s either faking it or he’s just antisocial’,” Bierdz recalls.

In an effort to help him make sense of the situation and come to terms with it, Bierdz decided to write a memoir called Forgiving Troy, which earned the Best Autobiography Award from USA Book News. “I get so many e-mails saying, ‘Oh, now I can share with you my concerns about my family member’ because they’re so afraid to tell people there’s schizophrenia in the family,” Bierdz said, adding, “Mental illness is so varied. It is so hard to define it. Unfortunately, there is a stigma to that.”

Bierdz has also shared his story at events hosted by the National Alliance for Research on Schizophrenia and Depression (NARSAD). “I hope to speak more because I’m aware my story is really not about me—it’s about forgiveness; it’s about inspiration. And if I could help people out with that, I want to,” Bierdz said, noting, “What is so cool about NARSAD (events) is the people that are attending usually have schizophrenia in their family and talk about it. Sometimes there are people with schizophrenia at the event. It’s great that the attendees have somebody else to talk to about what they are going through.”

Also a talented artist, Bierdz often paints works of art to auction off at events as a way to raise money for charities. So far, his paintings have raised over $100,000 for the charities he supports—NARSAD being one of them. “I first painted at a gala of their’s probably three years ago. There was a big (event) at Paramount. Rosalynn Carter was there,” he said, adding, “It was just a beautiful event.”

Bierdz said he plans to attend NARSAD’s major annual fundraiser again this year, although he doesn’t have details on the event yet. NARSAD is “very close to my heart because there’s schizophrenia in my family and depression, and so I really respect this organization. Hal and Patsy Hollister were interviewed for 60 Minutes many years ago about their daughter Annick, who is a schizophrenic, and she is a very, very talented artist. They’ve got other children as well that are not schizophrenic, but they were the players behind this organization.”

Aside from NARSAD, Bierdz also supports The Art of Elysium. “That is about bringing all kinds of artists to kids in need—and that’s usually to kids who are in the hospital and trying to recover. It’s a non-profit that’s all about just bringing creativity and inspiration to kids so they recover faster,” he said, adding, “In 2004, I did an event for The Art of Elysium and Scarlett Johansson hosted the gallery show. I had 250 pieces of my art at that, and it was a big success in Los Angeles.”

Bierdz, who is openly gay, has also been affiliated with the Human Rights Campaign (HRC), which is a civil rights organization working to achieve lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender equality. “I think they do wonderful things,” Bierdz said. At their black tie gala last September, HRC presented Bierdz with their Visibility Award for his dedication to doing charity work related to human rights through his art, acting, and writing.

To donate or to learn more about the charities Bierdz supports, including those mentioned in this article and others, please visit www.thombierdz.com. Autographed copies of Forgiving Troy can also be purchased on the site.